tatatascha's Journal

11:34PM - I stole this from one of my besties. humor me!

Pick a tv show, movie, book, whatever fandom you choose, and I'll tell you:

1. My most beloved character.
2. The character I adore, but never really expected to.
3. The couple that I love the most.
4. The couple I cannot stand.
5. My main problem with the show at the moment. (or if it is no longer on air, my biggest problem with the show in general)
6. The character I would bitchslap if given the chance.
7. The character I would do dirty things to, anytime, anywhere.
8. My five favorite characters.
9. My five least favorite characters
10. My favorite episode.
11. My favorite quote.
12. The character I want to be like when I grow up.
13. Whose job on the show I would like to have.
14. My one random fandom love, one that is not generally the norm.
15. Who I would kill off the show.

12:49PM

For those of you who wonder, my computer died once more. It's why I'm absent. I hope to return soon but dunno how long it'll take as the store I usually went to filed bankruptcy. I hope to be back soon because this just sucks.

Current mood: sad

5:59PM

Scary how much Sean Smith looks like Jeph Howard in this pic :S Maybe I'm seeing things though.

9:42AM

So I wrote this entry hoping I'd spark some discussion but I got nothing. Not one damn reply and it just makes me wonder.....( Why do I take the effort if nobody cares? )

Current mood: blah

11:58PM - Just so I can watch this over and over.

Current mood: excited

7:48PM

12:50AM - Rewritten parts of a The Dresden Dolls song called Backstabber. Bold is my alteration.

Current mood: pissed off

6:56AM

Time goes by now
but you can't seem to forget
I took for granted
all off the things that I had

I know I hurt you
Hear me out
Hear me out

For all the times
For all the cries
For all the pain I've caused
I apologize
lay down my pride
Give me one more chance
before you walk away

I understand the way you're feeling
(just don't walk away)
I know there are a million reasons
(to walk away)
I let you down but please just hear me out
(Before you walk away)
Before you walk away

For all the times
For all the cries
For all the pain I've caused
I apologize
lay down my pride
Give me one more chance
before you walk away

before you walk away..

Knowing you fucked up is terrible. Knowing the chance to make up for your mistakes has passed is even worse. Crying yourself to sleep every night after realising you've fucked up a friendship of more then three years, which means the world to you as that person meant so incredibly much to you is just devastating. I can't make her talk to me or make her listen. It's her choice to not talk to me but does it hurt? Hell yeah. I wish I could take it all back. Go back in time like Marty McFly and clean up my act but I can't. I fucked up and have to live with the result coming from my actions. I have to go on but right now if I could just crawl into a pit and didn't have to come out for a long time I'd gladly take the chance.

Life's not a song
Life isn't bliss
Life is just this
It's living.
You have to go on living.

The hardest thing in this world is living in it.

I have to see the anesthetics this afternoon about my gastric waistband operation. It's strange how even the small chance of dying on the operation table seems like an easy way out of all of what's been going on. It's even more strange when you wouldn't even mind if that happened.

Current mood: broken

10:14AM

There's something that you wanted to tell me
There's something that you want me to know
There's something that you want me to hear
Then why the hell won't you say it?

There's something that I wanted to tell you
There's something that I need you to know
There's something that I want you to hear
So why the hell won't you listen?

Current mood: crappy